This is just further evidence of how awesome my cat is, you know, in case you want me to stuff her in that mailing tube and send her your way.
In other news, I have plenty of other news, but it will wait until later tonight or this weekend. I have the evening to myself, but a day full of student conferences tomorrow. Send help!
My god, woman, what is wrong with you? Feed that cat. She is so malnourished! You know, people like you shouldn’t even be allowed to have pets. That poor feline would be better off out on the mean streets rather than shut up in an air-conditioned home with soft surfaces and food bowls only filled once a day! How could you?
(Bwahahahahaha!)
Clearly the cat is starving. Our cat is also starving at least twice a day. Sometimes she tries to convince us she’s starving more often than that.
I’ve seen too many fat cats and I prefer the starving ones. I think they’re happier, too.
Oh yeah, she is starving all right! Clearly, I am a bad cat owner. If you listen to her very loud complaints, anyway.
Incidentally, the jingle-jangle in the background is my dog (& his tags) running around. He makes his annoying voice heard in the end, too. Damn, my pets are so charming.
This cat is awesome! I will take this cat.
As it happens, I am somewhat fluent in cat speak. Roughly it’s “What is this, some sort of cruel hoax? VENGENCE SHALL BE MINE! Bwahaha”